Thursday, November 16, 2006

three-oh, oh oh!

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when i suffered my 26th birthday, i decided it'll be the last one i "celebrate". exactly then, (i was having a lunch do in viccuda) i got a phonecall announcing nor + man's baby arina's arrival across the road at the damansara specialist hospital. i spent the next one helping out with arina's first birthday party preparation. i'd probably do the same this year? (may i, mummy-o + daddy-o?)

call it a symptom of approaching the big three-oh, oh oh! (nope, now is not a good time to give that "age is just a number" talk. thanks very much.)

fine. no doubt turning 30 is only a barrier in the mind. it's not as if we'll suffer a combustion on the thirtieth birthday + we'd turn to ash or even that our braincells would suddenly frizzle away so that we'll start having spots of amnesia. it is purely an arbitrary milestone but one that inevitably leads to a greater reckoning.

jeng! jeng! jeng!

when i was young i never imagined that i would get to be so old. well, when i was young, i considered 25, old. (****** **** ****!!!) life stretched out before me, full of possibilities + without discernible limits. life, now, feels more like a roll of toilet paper that i've accidently dropped + am watching it disappear under the door, full of woe. (erk!) ok, fine. i exaggerate. (hey, you're reading words of a drama queen here.) but i reckon there is a nano technology of truth in the analogy. think about it, hmmmm ... or is it just me? (demmit!!!)

to be young is to be naive, optimistic, well even certain that our potential will be fulfilled in whichever field one chooses. often the means of the dreams do not have a specific shape but the ends are certain. fame, wealth, adulation + of course the attention of the opposite gender. (amboi! gatai no!!! ... hi hemsem! *wegra flashing her sexy smile* ... err ... sexy ke pun? :op)

of course, it's not all over.

but ... but the thing is napoleon was well on his way to becoming the first consul of france by the time he was 30. apparently, alexander the great had conquered three empires + was in the middle of destroying a fourth on his birthday. i wonder what would i be doing on my thirtieth birthday? go to subang parade's cold storage to buy myself a tub of ben + jerry's? (oits! i'm not 30 yet ok ... i still have a few more YEARS. what? you didn't get that ... Y.E.A.R.S. to go. thank you.)

let continue ... orson welles directed citizen kane when he was 26. the beatles had already disbanded before any of them were 30. nicholas leeson bankrupted the 227 year old british investment bank, barrings, when he was 28.

now lets move closer to home ... hafiz ibrahim directed his first petronas ad + used humour to deliver a message instead of the typical yasmin ahmadesque meruntun jiwa (was his the first?) at the age of 23. ada orang ni + ada orang tu are earning 5 digit salaries at 23 and 25 respectively. sigh!

but then again i suppose i should be more circumspect.

proust was 32 when he started writing. woody allen was 34 when he directed his first film. freud was 44 when he published the interpretation of dreams.

closer to home, both yasmin ahmad + fly guy were in their 30s when they started earning their 5 digit salaries. (betul ka hearsay ini?)

as we approach 30, we know that childhood has come to an end + yet we still cannot truly believe ourselves to be adults. sometimes our achievements do not match up to our expectations, our post-graduation life plan failed to materialise, we suddenly find ourselves in a different path altogether. sometimes we realise that the best opportunity or answers we've embraced have now become a burden. sometimes we hear a little voice whispering, telling us that we are mediocre.

don't get me wrong. i don't hate my life, though i'm way off my initial 'life plan' + i've had that moment of bliss, where i thought life's perfect. i have self belief but sometimes when i sit in a corner to reflect + asked myself what i've done, i have very great trouble finding anything that i can point to as something i am really proud of. i've read quite a few good books, seen more films that i care to mention, travelled to a few destinations, tried extreme sports, did some charity work, saw a few good plays, went for gigs, saw robbie williams in his blue boxers shorts, but none of them things would look too good on a CV. then again, is having the best CV it in life?

even as the years fly by + birthdays chasing one another, all moving at a rapid speed after starting at the corner of 25, i'm no nearer an answer. maybe i'm getting wiser, well, i hope i'm getting wiser. in the end, i'd have to quote alfie, where, at the end of the movie, he turns to the viewers + says "i don't know. life, eh. i mean, what's it all about?"

by the way, i think i'll now have to push my 'old' mark to a kadar umur yang jauh lebih tinggi, since now i'm a strong proponent of "life begins at 40".

have a good weekend in singapore, zeeks + tiena, not forgetting cikpijoh who's now in ceruk mana ntah kat the uk tu. :o(

i'm imposing a good weekend to all as well! :o)

something from maliq + d'essentials for you peeps...


"kangen"

17 comments:

Desparil said...

i got my superpowers when i turned 30. i could expand horizontally faster than sv can say 'tol naik'.

granted, i always had that special ability. it's just that after 30 it went into hyperdrive.

oh yeah.


p/s- i wanna recruit you for operation *cough* dzu. kita divide 70-30. you in?

Erra said...

des

30% pun 30% lah! i'm so in!!!

see you on wednesday! hehe!

superdzu said...

ha?
operation apa ni?


dzu tgh mode clueless.

Erra said...

dzu

tak de apa2 ... you'll be at the laundry on wednesday ... see you there ... lama gells tak jumpa

superdzu said...

yes so true.

i belum bermaaf zahir batin lagi ngan u.

hu hu

p/s:
wear something sexy ok?

Erra said...

psst! des ... about our project *cough* dzu

tu, kat atas tu ... she requested something sexy ... i'll have to wear t-shirt "ciplak" yang gedabak tu, zeekaa, my boss for that nite paksa ... who don't you wear something sexy ... if you need anything from my wardrobe, do tell

mana tahu ... it'll be a bigger *cough* for us

Jade said...

30 is the new 20!

I am also fast approaching the 'worrying' 30 mark. Will have either diva size b*tch fit or a fabulous party on the date. Still can't decide. May even be a total diva at the fab party. What do you think?

Then again, I think older girls are utterly fabulous (can u tell that I am overusing the word?). More in tune with the self physically and emotionally. Killer fashion sense. Less hang-ups. Better at handling baggages.

Date a younger man to keep young. Heh heh.. Boleh ka?

Hurrah the 30s!

che'fara said...

alaa tadih comment somethig now hilang.

neways, as for me i cant wait being 28 like that.because people are not taking me seriously.betull tak tipu.or wa it me the one yang potray childish image.sighh.

dont worrylah babe, getting older means getting wiser betui dak? u jer yang tak napak.

cheers!

ti.e.na said...

eeee da tua!:p

Anonymous said...

Then again, Tun Dr M entered active politics at 40 kan? And love him or hate him, look how far he went. Something worth thinking about I guess, or at least to make you feel better. It works for me :)

*goes back to planning of world domination

Erra said...

jade

be a total diva at the fab party!!!

the thing is i've been dating younger boys all my life, i'm now wondering how it'll be like to date older men? :op

che'fara

last night ... i discovered people respond to us ... if we are being childlike ... then they treat us like a kid ... if we're pretending all mature, if they don't know us yet ... they'll treat us like adult until they discover the real us ... :op

last night i was bullied by a 3 1/2 year old boy ... my kasut chanteek dah hilang it's rose ... the boy tarik ... :o(

ti.e.na

shaddap la yewww!!!

imran

*wegra skodeng imran's world domination plan*

Desparil said...

whaat? are you saying the clothes i normally wear aint sexy??

i am hurted..

:(

Erra said...

des

huh? des ... am not implying anything ... tipu!!! tipu!!!

ayoh! like d'uh, you're sexy ok! hot stuff gila! you the man!!! you the man!!!

korang!!!!!!!! adakah des sexy?

(des, we need your sexy pose)

suzequatro said...

u r one sexy 33 year old man dess..(are u 33?)

eh weggy apa tetiba talkin about being 30 and all nih..hmmm

bila nak ben n jerry?

Erra said...

sooz

hefle, sebook dok remind me we'll be 30 soon + we had the talk, a scary one

pastu, last week stupe turned 30

and a few days ago muz mentioned something about 30 after copycat-ing my 08.08.08. sebook ok mamat tu!

zeekaa!!! you're coming to mine, nyettt muz, ok!!!

chics said...

oh god that chubby hubby lama betol nak habis!

Erra said...

chics

sedap ok, sedap